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Lizzy lost her dad at age 6. Her mum was devastated. The family’s support system crashed. No one to help. The burden of upkeep became too heavy.
Her dad’s family weren’t too friendly anymore. As there were insinuations that her mum’s ill-luck caused her dad’s untimely death.

One uncle suggested marrying Lizzy’s mum since she was still young and youthful. On second thoughts he decided not to.
Moreover, he was influenced by the family not to, as the ill luck that was associated with Lizzy’s mum could also affect him and cause his untimely death. As if the widow would really think it a great idea to marry the uncle of her late husband.

In the end, Lizzy and her mum were thrown out of the house. After all, Lizzy wasn’t even a male child who could carry on the family name.

Faced with a hard life and uncertainty, Lizzy’s mum had to settle for a remarriage. She needed to survive. Her daughter at least needed a roof over her head. She had been out of job since she gave birth to Lizzy. Hence, getting a job immediately was a mountain too high to climb.

Her option of settling for a remarriage to escape the hardship as a result of her husband’s sudden demise turned out sour for Lizzy.
Lizzy was immediately exposed to a life she never envisaged as a little girl. First, she had to contend for her mum’s affection. Then started the physical and sexual abuse she had to endure from her step-father which really distressed her.

With no form of rescue in view, Lizzy had to quickly settle for her condition and internalized all her experiences, as horrible as they were. She could not tell her mum of the abuse she continually suffered at the hands of her step-father. There was no one to reach out to, no one to talk to, let alone defend her.
She soon became bitter, anti-social, developed low self-esteem and performed poorly in school. She became uncoordinated and was lost in a world of uncertainty with no hope of anyone ever finding her.

She managed to escape from her step-father and mother at age 15. For the First time in many years she felt free. However, the emotional trauma and pains inflicted upon her since childhood continued to haunt her.
The feeling of freedom gradually disappeared and she became confused not knowing what to do or where to turn. She quickly resolved to do whatever had to be done, to pay for whatever she needed in order to survive.
Her emotional state didn't help either. The love she so earnestly yearned for made her easy prey for prowling wolves and the unscrupulous. She lost every restraint and thought nothing of using her body to her advantage. After all that was the only means of survival available to her.

Her physical needs were being met. But her emotions got shattered the more at the turn of each day. She tried getting a job as a sales girl. She did that for a while, only for her to be fired suddenly for some shortage due to her being absent minded. Poor Lizzy. Life wasn't fair on her and what was already bad seemed only to be getting worse.

Lizzy became emotionally distraught. She felt, unloved, used, abused, depressed, distorted, and embittered. She started to hate people. Lizzy really needed help.
At a point she felt she couldn't go on again. What was the point to life after all? She thought to herself. She certainly was a waste of conception, a waste of time and a total waste of space. “Why not end my miserable life”, she thought to herself.

Committing suicide? Is that really the solution?

To be continued in the next post. Stay tuned.

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