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1346
Lizzy went on the internet to read about committing suicide. Of course who would really want to commit suicide and go about asking people on how to. Very few would do that.
She soon found out different ways of committing suicide. I wish she could gather the strength to google instead “how to overcome emotional challenges or how to be free from life’s issues or I need help”. However, it is understandable these issues can be overwhelming and causes negative energies to surge more than the positive.

Lizzy tried a couple of things to end her life but she didn’t die. She admitted it takes some guts to end one’s life if not influenced by demons. She was later grateful that demons didn’t attend to her thoughts of committing suicide all the while.

She admitted committing suicide was not the way out.

It turned out that someone had been observing her while she was working. Lizzy really couldn’t have noticed there was someone looking out for her. And of course having been through life so roughly at such an early stage, it never crossed her mind that anyone could genuinely love and care for her.

Eventually, this lady sought her out. Gradually Lizzy warmed up to the lady and was able to share her story in episodes.
For the first time she didn’t feel judged for her way of life and past experience. What a relief. She experienced the reality of someone truly loving her and wanted nothing in return.

Perhaps you are just like Lizzy. You have issues weighing you down and just no one to talk to especially in climes and regions where you as a victim will be blamed and stigmatized for circumstances you didn’t have control over such as similar to Lizzy’s case.

This post is dedicated to you whether male or female, to let you know that you are not alone.

Life may have been tough for you growing up just like it was for Lizzy. You have these battles going on in your mind. You feel no one cares and no one can understand.

Yes you are right about no one being able to understand. However, sharing with someone eases the burden.

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And then the question of who can I share with. Everyone seems to be having their issues and as a result they say “fix yourself”.
I am glad to let you know there is a way out. If you believe in God, simply pray to Him to send you someone you can trust and feel free to talk to. Who can hold your hand through such a phase as you become better.

At Better Me, we love you and care about you.

Edited by Tobi Oni undefined
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1364
Lizzy lost her dad at age 6. Her mum was devastated. The family’s support system crashed. No one to help. The burden of upkeep became too heavy.
Her dad’s family weren’t too friendly anymore. As there were insinuations that her mum’s ill-luck caused her dad’s untimely death.

One uncle suggested marrying Lizzy’s mum since she was still young and youthful. On second thoughts he decided not to.
Moreover, he was influenced by the family not to, as the ill luck that was associated with Lizzy’s mum could also affect him and cause his untimely death. As if the widow would really think it a great idea to marry the uncle of her late husband.

In the end, Lizzy and her mum were thrown out of the house. After all, Lizzy wasn’t even a male child who could carry on the family name.

Faced with a hard life and uncertainty, Lizzy’s mum had to settle for a remarriage. She needed to survive. Her daughter at least needed a roof over her head. She had been out of job since she gave birth to Lizzy. Hence, getting a job immediately was a mountain too high to climb.

Her option of settling for a remarriage to escape the hardship as a result of her husband’s sudden demise turned out sour for Lizzy.
Lizzy was immediately exposed to a life she never envisaged as a little girl. First, she had to contend for her mum’s affection. Then started the physical and sexual abuse she had to endure from her step-father which really distressed her.

With no form of rescue in view, Lizzy had to quickly settle for her condition and internalized all her experiences, as horrible as they were. She could not tell her mum of the abuse she continually suffered at the hands of her step-father. There was no one to reach out to, no one to talk to, let alone defend her.
She soon became bitter, anti-social, developed low self-esteem and performed poorly in school. She became uncoordinated and was lost in a world of uncertainty with no hope of anyone ever finding her.

She managed to escape from her step-father and mother at age 15. For the First time in many years she felt free. However, the emotional trauma and pains inflicted upon her since childhood continued to haunt her.
The feeling of freedom gradually disappeared and she became confused not knowing what to do or where to turn. She quickly resolved to do whatever had to be done, to pay for whatever she needed in order to survive.
Her emotional state didn't help either. The love she so earnestly yearned for made her easy prey for prowling wolves and the unscrupulous. She lost every restraint and thought nothing of using her body to her advantage. After all that was the only means of survival available to her.

Her physical needs were being met. But her emotions got shattered the more at the turn of each day. She tried getting a job as a sales girl. She did that for a while, only for her to be fired suddenly for some shortage due to her being absent minded. Poor Lizzy. Life wasn't fair on her and what was already bad seemed only to be getting worse.

Lizzy became emotionally distraught. She felt, unloved, used, abused, depressed, distorted, and embittered. She started to hate people. Lizzy really needed help.
At a point she felt she couldn't go on again. What was the point to life after all? She thought to herself. She certainly was a waste of conception, a waste of time and a total waste of space. “Why not end my miserable life”, she thought to herself.

Committing suicide? Is that really the solution?

To be continued in the next post. Stay tuned.

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